Failure

I should have known that giving up sugar the week after my birthday was a plan destined to fail. I mean really, who does that kind of thing (with the possible exception of people who want to fail that is…)? I went into work all proud of myself and my black coffee with a breakfast of clementines, plain english muffin (without jam), and hard-boiled egg behind me. I had a healthy relatively sugar free lunch packed. I was ready to go.

And then… I walked into work upset because my classroom had been relatively torn apart by a photo shoot that had taken place there over the weekend. It took me most of the day to get it back to normal, and even now there’s some stuff that’s just not right. (Emotional Eating Trigger #1) I had a meeting after school on a Monday. On Mondays all I really want to do after school is nap. (Emotional Eating Trigger #2) I was feeling stressed because I hadn’t finished my lesson plans, and I’m missing a day of work this week so I need to be ahead of the game, not behind. (Emotional Eating Trigger #3)

So already, I’m more or less feeling set up to fail when I walk into the teacher’s lounge where there’s a smorgasbord of free food. Cupcakes, box lunches, fruit with whipped cream, you name it, it seemed to be there. My healthy lunch of fruit with plain yogurt, and rice pilaf no longer sounded so appealing. I managed to squeeze by with trading in my sack lunch for a box lunch of salad and a piece of bread, threw the dressing on the salad before I looked at the ingredients and then discovered, sugar was the #3 ingredient. I gave myself a free pass on that one since it’s only my first day, but it made me realize that sugar is hiding in more places than I realized, and if I’m going to do this successfully, I’m going to have to be more aware (or just eat my sack lunch).

As for the warm chocolate brownie with vanilla ice cream I ate at community group tonight? Well, that was for my birthday… and it made me more aware of the fact that “special occasions” lurk around every corner, and I’d better decide what really is a special occasion before everyday becomes an excuse to pop some sugar into me.

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